


A one-night thing?

by Miscellaneous_mess



Category: Great Gatsby - F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby (2013)
Genre: Bisexual Male Character, Bisexuality, Daisy (mentioned) - Freeform, Fluff, Gay, Gay Male Character, Gay Nick Carraway, Jay Gatsby Lives, LGBTQ Character, LGBTQ Themes, M/M, No Smut, Non-Graphic Smut, Past Jay Gatsby/Daisy, Past Nick/Chester, bisexual jay gatsby
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2020-12-23
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:00:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28263549
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miscellaneous_mess/pseuds/Miscellaneous_mess
Summary: Nick reflects on his relationship with Chester McKee but knows he longs for so much with Jay Gatsby. When Gatsby unexpectedly shows up at his doorstep when Nick was about to try and forget everything neither expects the outcome.
Relationships: Nick Carraway/Jay Gatsby, Nick Carraway/Mr. McKee
Comments: 4
Kudos: 23





	A one-night thing?

Many people regret their one-night stands, but do I? No, well maybe. I believe that it led me to where I am today and I don't mind that. 

Chester McKee crossed my mind every once in a while, what we did that night never bothered me. We were two men trapped in a world that would never understand who we are but that night we had each other and that was what mattered. I am glad at the time that I didn't know who Gatsby was or else I might've moaned his name instead. Granted Chester certainly didn't know mine which I could tell from the slew of other names he shouted, all of which were unmistakably male. 

After that night I went to his place every Friday which raises another question: Does it count as a one-night stand if I continue to see him? Sure we continued to have casual sex but every time we were both drunk. Beforehand, he would always talk for hours about the different pictures he had taken. He mentioned several times, about wanting to photograph me. I couldn't, I wasn't a model by any means and never would be. 

After I met Gatsby at his party my visits to Chester’s got less and less frequent until I no longer went. Something about it didn't satisfy me, but he tried, something I thought Gatsby would never even try. It was my fault, I allowed myself to be swoon and fall into his trap of trying to get my cousin to fall in love with him. I wished he wasn't so blind, I wish Gatsby could have seen that ever since that first night I couldn't take my eyes off of him. 

What I didn't expect was Gatsby showing up on my doorstep stating that Daisy was never going to pick him. I could have told him that but I stayed silent pretending to be sympathetic. 

“Why did you come here then?” I asked tentatively but genuinely curious.  
“I don't know old sport, I just… I didn't want to be alone,” he said almost like he didn't recognize his voice, confused when the sound came from him. 

I knew that feeling, the feeling of desperately not wanting to be alone. I think it's what let my infatuation with Mr. McKee grow, I think it’s why I could love someone quickly and easily. I watched as a tear fell down Jay’s face. I stepped forward and wiped it away. 

“I’m here,” I told him, “and I'm not leaving. If you want me I'm here.”

Did friends talk to each other like that? I never thought they did but when he just smiled part of me broke wishing that he would have kissed me instead. Neither of us moved back though and my hand stayed on his face which he didn't move. 

“Nick?” he tried.

I paused at the use of my name. He didn't continue.

“Please, I can't do this, not again,” I mumbled and withdrew my hand. 

He looked at me quizzically. Maybe he thought I was broken, maybe he was second-guessing all this and was debating if it was too late to run away from his problems. 

“Who?” He asked, “when?”  
That wasn't the response I was expecting but I answered his questions regardless, “Chester McKee, it happened before I knew who you were and I’ve only seen him twice after I met you. His conversation was dull and less satisfying.”   
“His conversation only?” He raised an eyebrow.   
“A lot more than just his conversation. It was just a small agreement between acquaintances, we never said each other’s names.”   
“Oh, so you just don't want to live through that again. Of being attached to a person that will never feel anything back?”  
“I thought I was over you,” I told him, “I was going to see him tonight and rid my mind of you and yet now you show up on my doorstep like, like this.” 

Gatsby stopped, so did I. I didn't mean to share that much, he wasn't supposed to know any of that, and yet I was just babbling like an idiot.   
Gatsby took a small step forward, I wanted to move back, but to be stuck in an endless tango would do me no good either. 

“Moments ago you told me you wouldn't leave,” Gatsby mentioned.   
“I’m here,” I repeated, “I’m not leaving.”   
“Why?” he asked as if I hadn't spilled it all before.  
“Because if I leave I don't know what would happen if I stayed,” I answered.  
“If you want him you should leave, you could have a chance,” he told me.

I rolled my eyes and took a small step forward so we were inches apart.

“I don't want him,” I whispered and gently pressed my lips against his. 

Jay took a moment to relax but then kissed me back. 

“Don’t leave,” his voice was quiet but it was pleading with me.  
“Never,” I agreed. 

I wanted to kiss him again but I needed him to initiate it, I had to be sure that at least some part of him wanted me. After a second he did lean in and I wanted to care about how he had looked so vulnerable and desperate when he first came in but when you have wanted something so long I was struggling. 

“Tell me this isn't some plan with a bunch of alternative motives?” My voice came like a question that was begging for a no.  
“I can't say this was my intention for coming here but I can tell you I don't regret this and it certainly isn't a part of any plan.”   
“Come back tomorrow,” I requested.  
“I could just stay the night,” Gatsby smirked.   
“Al...alright,” I stuttered. 

Waking up next to Jay surprised me. I didn't want to admit I had expected him to leave but I never knew what Gatsby was going to do. He woke up shortly after me and smiled when he did.

“Is this more than a one-night thing?” I asked tentatively.  
“What do you want it to be?”   
“Of course I want this to last longer than one night but I learned that what I want hardly ever matters.”  
“Did you ever think about why I continued to pursue Daisy again and again?” He asked me.  
I scrunched my eyebrows, “your past. You were so caught up in repeating it, you had spent five years building up this unachievable pedestal, and…”  
“Nick!” He cut me off, “it was an excuse. If I insisted I only ever had her on my mind then it didn't matter who actually was.”  
“If it was a man they wouldn't know? Because you told them that it was her?” I said starting to connect some dots in my head.   
He nodded, “It was always ‘her’.”  
“So who has been on your mind lately?” I asked.  
“Well for the first four years I had to figure it out, I had to figure out that girls might be my thing but they certainly aren't the only thing that really gets me going. Then you came around, I convinced Jordan to bribe you in order to get closer to Daisy, but I only wanted to know about you.”   
I kissed him gently, “you can ask anything you like.”   
“Why were you going to go to his place last night?”  
“I told you, I was tired of only ever being able to think about you when I thought I never crossed your mind.”   
“I know but what intrigued you about me in the first place?”   
“Your money, your place, your smile, your eyes, damn near everything. I felt like I knew nothing about you yet you held yourself like an open book.” 

Gatsby kissed me. I don't think he would ever understand what he did to me but the bliss continued to feel unreal. 

“You're so much more than one night,” he told me, “an entire lifetime with you wouldn't be enough. I don't think I could ever get enough of you.”   
“I’ll never leave, just please don't…” I trailed off unable to finish my sentence.   
“I’m here,” he said.

The conversation was like a promise. Something we were vowing never to break. Chester no longer crossed my mind, somehow, everything was about Jay when we were together. So I never got the answer to my questions but it doesn't matter what Chester was because he is only a man of the past and I don't wish to repeat the past. 

I never understood how a man could be so much to me. I don't think he quite understood either. Together we would figure it out. We were so much more than one night and an entire life was hardly enough but as long as I was with him then nothing else mattered.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this instead of paying attention in English and I don't regret my decision. I was supposed to be reading some article on why college should be cheaper... I think *shrug*


End file.
